SIMPLICITY, SOLITUDE AND SILENCE

A Parable

            Once upon a time, long, long ago and far away, there lived three sisters: Simplicity, Solitude and Silence. These three sisters graced the local church and were well loved.

Simplicity was a light-hearted sort. She loved people and always had a welcoming way about her. She would lay a meal for anyone who came to visit. It didn’t matter how little or how much there was in the family pantry. She would lay out what she had and sit down to enjoy her visitor as if that person were a visiting king or queen. And oh, how she loved God! Her clothes may have been well worn, her hair cut simply and her house modest, but with God and visitors, she felt herself to be very, very rich.

Solitude loved visitors as well, but she particularly loved to go off alone into the nearby fields and woods, where she would roam the countryside or just sit and feel the breeze, listen to the birds, and take in the view. She would think about her life and how it was going, and she would look to God, inviting Him to think with her and to talk with her. Then the two of them would fall silent and just enjoy one another with no other distractions.

Silence was unable to speak but was full of wisdom. It was like she was always listening to a voice not heard by human ears. She radiated joy everywhere. Happy to be working, content to be resting, satisfied with cleaning - she was alive to all of life and delighted in it.

Years passed, and the sisters still lived together. But something was happening all around them. The world, including the local church, was getting busier. Their town was growing, stores popped up everywhere, factories opened, and the woods and fields were pushed further and further away as the town became a city and more cities appeared. The sisters’ church was now a poor, dying thing lost in the midst of the inner city. Few visitors dropped by the sisters’ house anymore; they were all too busy doing other things. The fields and woods for Solitude were being bulldozed, and Silence was lost in among the noisy world around her. Life was definitely not the same for the three sisters. Simplicity was being pressured to sell out so a new factory could be built where her house stood. But the most difficult thing of all for them was that it was so hard anymore to hear the voice of God. Most people had no time for that and, besides, they thought the sisters very odd in that they seemed to think they could talk with God as if they were his closest friends. How crazy was that!

But one day, someone came to the sisters’ door. A young man, well-dressed, obviously from a part of town well away from where he was knocking. He carried a briefcase made of finest leather. And when Simplicity came to the door, he looked at her with eyes full of pain and blurted out: “Tell me what you have. I know you have something that I don’t and I really, really need it. I have everything else, but I’m still not happy. You have none of it, but I hear you’re happy. Uptown, we hear stories about the three crazy ladies who live here and think they have it all. How do you do that? My friends laugh at you and think you’re a joke, but I think you have what’s really important. Except I don’t even know what it is. Would you teach me?” And so the three sisters took their disciple and showed him the way of Simplicity, Solitude and Silence. And the man learned well. He went back to his home in the better part of town, but he went back a wiser and richer man.

The Three Sisters

Simplicity, solitude and silence are ancient practices of the people of God. Over time, they have come and gone and come again. In some generations, they are practised and have benefited God’s people immensely; in other generations, like our own, they are not so popular, and the church of God has suffered as a result. Let’s take a look at them one by one.

Simplicity

            Simplicity is something on the inside of us that has a huge impact on how we live our lives. It is a concept that is not well received in the western world, where we idolize success, possessions and getting ahead. This is probably why we also have such high rates of stress-related illnesses among us.

Simplicity is about the focus of our lives. The Bible says (Colossians 3:1-2): “Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.” When we set our minds on the things of God, life becomes very simple:

There are only two values to live by:

Matthew 22:

37  Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’

38  This is the first and greatest commandment.

39  And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’

40  All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

Only one thing is needed:

Luke 10

41  “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things,

42  but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

There is only one thing that counts:

Galatians 5:6

6  For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision has any value. The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love.

There is only one thing to do above all other things:

Proverbs 4

23  Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.

There is only one work of God:

John 6

28  Then they asked him, “What must we do to do the works God requires?”

29  Jesus answered, “The work of God is this: to believe in the one he has sent.”

Only three things remain forever, but one of the three is the greatest:

1 Corinthians 13

13  And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Put it all together, and what makes for the perfect life according to God? A life where God loves us and we love God and people, including ourselves. Period. This is the simple life.

But westerners chase so many other things, things that are very much earthly. We value people, but not because they are God’s creations. We tend to value people according to what they do or produce. And so we ask people whom we meet for the first time: “What do you do?” And we tell our kids to work hard at school so they can make something of themselves, as if they are nothing unless they have good, high-paying jobs. We also value having it all. We can easily be made to feel shame if someone points out that we are wearing last year’s fashions. We have such an attachment to things that we’ll buy things we don’t really want to impress people we don’t really like. Even in our hero stories, we tell tales about “rags to riches” but we seldom, if ever, tell stories about riches to voluntary poverty, like Jesus. And we value activity. We believe that the busier we are, the better we are or the more important we are. Ask the average North American how they are and odds are they’ll say “busy”.

Jesus said (Matthew 6:21): “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” If we have bought into the idea that to be somebody we have to do all we can to achieve success, as high a standard of living as possible, lots of material goods for our kids, and so on, then that is where our heart will be. But how can such a heart be content or at rest when there is the next children’s activity to pay for and get to, the next of many credit card bills to pay, the next rung of the corporate ladder to train for and climb, next year’s fashions to shop for, and so on? The poor, too, can fall into this trap. And so Jesus’ words about not worrying so much about where your next meal is coming from was spoken for them:

Matthew 6

25  “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes?

26  Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?

27  Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life ?

28  “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin.

29  Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.

30  If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?

31  So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’

Romans 14

19  Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.

Hebrews 4

Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest . . .

But the Bible says:

Luke 12

Then he [Jesus] said to them, “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.”

Romans 14

For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit . . .

In other words, the Bible advises simplicity. Simplicity doesn’t mean that we live with a “hate on” for accomplishments, success and material goods. We can have things, do our best in life and find ourselves quite accomplished and successful. Rather, simplicity is refusing to be attached to these things so that they drive our lives. Instead, we live our lives out of what is true about us: our lives are gifts from God and we live as the gifts we are. Gifts are to be enjoyed and shared, and that is how we live. We have nothing to prove, no low self-esteem issues to try to resolve with a little more success, and nothing important to get that we don’t already have in Christ (2 Peter 1:3): “His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.” If we lose our success or our possessions, we aren’t concerned because they were never so important to us anyway (Philippians 4:12): “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” We also live care-free about our social status (Matthew 19:30): “But many who are first will be last, and many who are last will be first.”

What is it that makes for the perfect life according to God? A life where God loves us and we love God and people, including ourselves. And, since “love never fails” (1 Corinthians 13:8), we can’t lose our perfect life, ever. The core of simplicity is to take God at His word: that the first two commandments sum up all of life. If we are living those, we are living as we were intended to live.

What does this look like in everyday life? In everyday life, we make time for God alone. Just for God. Spending time with Him. Talking, but also listening. And as we hear, we follow. We follow the divine voice (Isaiah 30:21): “Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, ‘This is the way; walk in it.’” We ignore all the other voices telling us what we should pursue.

Put another way, we live with three attitudes:

(1)        Everything I have is a gift (1 Corinthians 4:7): “For who makes you different from anyone else? What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as though you did not?”

(2)        All that I have is to be cared for by God (1 Peter 5:7; The Message): “Live carefree before God; he is most careful with you.”

(3)        All that we have is available to others (Acts 20:35): “In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’“

This is the opposite of being anxious, where we believe things like:

(1)        God helps those who help themselves; in other words, ultimately it’s us who take care of ourselves, with a little divine help. The truth is that we work for what we have, but what we have does not come from our work (Psalm 127:1): “Unless the LORD builds the house, its builders labor in vain. Unless the LORD watches over the city, the watchmen stand guard in vain.”

(2)        We have to guard, lock up, insure and watch over our stuff. We are stewards who are 100% responsible for what’s been given to us and God will be upset if we don’t look after our stuff well. The truth is that it’s wise to lock up at night, but nothing is completely burglar-proof. And, if our stuff gets stolen, so what? We are not to “store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal” but to “store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal” (Matthew 6:19-20).

(3)        There’s not enough to go around, so I don’t have much to share. I need to keep it for myself … in case of a rainy day. The truth is that rainy days come, but we don’t have to lose our peace because of them. We will always have enough to give: “Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you” (Luke 6:38).

            As we drop our attachments to so many things and attach ourselves only to what Christ says are healthy things to focus our lives on, we become inwardly simple. As this happens, our lifestyle will also change. What will that look like exactly? That is unknown. For each life, it will be different. But here are some things that may change for you:

(1)        You no longer buy things to impress others, but only what is useful, affordable and reasonable.

(2)        If you have addictions - to sports, food, drink, gossip, sex, whatever - you seek to break their hold over you. Simplicity is about being free.

(3)        You don’t schedule every waking moment of every day, but you leave time set aside to do nothing - just to be and to enjoy the things of life you never had time for before.

(4)        You give more, share more and live life with less stuff.

(5)        You learn to say “no” to salespeople, other forms of advertising, other people and yourself.

(6)        You realize that you can enjoy things without owning them.

(7)        Your “yes” means “yes” and your “no” means “no”.

(8)        You are more accepting of what is. This is not to say that things don’t need to change, but that you don’t stress over life as it is now, but accept that it is the way it is - for now.

(9)        You always keep the main thing the main thing:

Matthew 22:

37  Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’

38  This is the first and greatest commandment.

39  And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’

40  All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

Solitude

            Solitude makes some people uncomfortable. If left alone with nothing to do, they become restless and fidgety and have no idea what to do with themselves. Others fear being alone, believing that being alone means being lonely.

            But solitude is not loneliness or an emptiness needing to be filled. When we are alone, we are free to be ourselves, to let our hair down, to not care what someone else may think. So solitude brings freedom. For the Christian, it also brings fullness. When we go away by ourselves, we leave behind all our responsibilities, activities, lists of things to do, and so on. We empty ourselves of it all in order to make lots of room for God. Our example in this is Jesus (Luke 5):

15  Yet the news about him spread all the more, so that crowds of people came to hear him and to be healed of their sicknesses.

16  But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.

            Solitude is an attitude of our heart. We don’t have to get away from it all in order to have solitude, although it helps a lot. A person in the midst of things can draw aside in their heart into a place of solitude where nothing around them intrudes. On the other hand, being alone doesn’t guarantee that we’ll be in solitude. A person can go off alone and be filled with concerns, anxious thoughts, memories, voices of people past and present, near and far - not alone at all, but crowded.

            The closest many people come to what they think is solitude is going away on vacation in order to rest up, take a break, have some down time - all of which have to do with recharging our batteries in order to return to our busy lives. There is nothing wrong with resting and renewing ourselves; we need to do this from time to time. Solitude will provide some of this, but that is not its main purpose. The main purpose of solitude is to hear God better. Alone, we turn our ear to His still, small voice and listen.

            Solitude is a discipline as well as an inner attitude. It is something we do deliberately. We don’t necessarily need a lot of money or time to “get away” in order to practise solitude. One of the ways we can capture some solitude is to take advantage of those little bits of empty time that we always encounter - standing in line at the checkout, waiting in the doctor’s office, walking from the bus stop to home, taking a coffee break. We can use some of these times to draw aside in our heart to listen heavenward.

            As to finding a place to get away, that can be as simple as a chair set aside in your home. If anyone sits in that chair, the message to everyone else is: “Don’t bother me. I need to be alone.”

            Several times a year, it is a good idea to take three to four hours (an evening at home, some time in the library) to consider where your life is headed and to re-evaluate your life’s goals. Listen to God for direction or re-direction.

            Once a year, if possible, go on a weekend retreat -- anywhere, just to be alone with God.

Silence

            What use do you make of words? Do you use them to manage and control others, to get what you want, to give what you think the other person needs, to make yourself look good to others? Most of us do use words to control our world. If we do, and we become silent, who then takes control?

            As Christians, we are fond of saying that God is in control of our lives. But is He really? If you were to spend one day in silence, what would that look like? Could the office go on without your words? Would the kids behave? Would your wife cook what you want for dinner or the clerk in the store know what you are looking for? Would any of that matter? If so, how much would it matter? And how much would you be able to rest in the knowledge that, for that one day, God is in control?

            Being silent allows us to hear God well, especially when He talks in a still, small voice (1 Kings 19):

11  The LORD said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by.” Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake.

12  After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper.

The Scripture is clear that, if we hope to get to know God at all, this will involve some practice of silence:

Psalm 46

10  “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”

Exodus 14

14  The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still.”

Psalm 37

7  Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes.

8  Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret--it leads only to evil.

9  For evil men will be cut off, but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the land.

Isaiah 30

15  This is what the Sovereign LORD, the Holy One of Israel, says: “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it.

            Yet some find silence to be quite frightening. Noise is all around us; it’s comfortable. Traffic, radios, humming appliances - our world is never still unless the power goes out. When we go walking in the countryside, many of us take a companion to talk to or a walkman to listen to music. When we do enter a quiet place and stop talking, we may still not enter silence. An inner conversation may start. Thoughts about our problems, cares, complaints, issues and things still to do rise up in our minds and cry for our attention. This inner talk may be noisier and more distressing than the noise we left behind and so we run back to that other noise.

            Silence is an inner stillness. It has a lot to do, not with our theology that God is in control, but our faith and trust in His control. It is having nothing to talk about, so complete is our faith in God (Matthew 6):

7  And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words.

8  Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.

Do we ever talk to God? Of course. In this same passage of Scripture, Jesus gives some words to pray - the Lord’s Prayer. Later in the New Testament, however, we are told about tongues - words with no conscious thought (1 Corinthians 14:2): “For anyone who speaks in a tongue does not speak to men but to God. Indeed, no one understands him; he utters mysteries with his spirit.” But then we are introduced to how Holy Spirit prays, and He prays without words at all (Romans 8:26): “In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.” In other words, true praying in the Spirit has no words. God expresses the depths of his heart and ours without speaking. In prayer, as in the rest of our life, there is “a time to be silent and a time to speak” (Ecclesiastes 3:7). It’s a question of balance.

            Silence is about those times of not speaking. It is also about waiting on God, having faith, stilling our soul in perfect trust. It is being with God without trying to manipulate God, get from God, or convince God to do something. It is resting all that we are in all that God is and needing nothing more.

            As a discipline, try going a day, or even a few hours without talking. Take a silent retreat. Try to find ways to relate to God and to others that don’t involve words. Make time just to be (click on the Meditation button on the home page for a wealth of ideas about how to do this). Get away from the city and get away alone into a quiet place where you can sit and listen.

So what?

            The three sisters slow our lives down and cause us to make time for God alone - to listen to Him, to be with Him, to allow Him to renew and refresh us, and to make us over into His image. They show us what really matters in life - to love God and to love the people God has made - all of them. They encourage us to send roots down deep into the Saviour’s love, to stop a while and drink long and slow from the well of salvation. If you are passionate to really know God, try spending some time with Simplicity, Solitude and Silence, and see what they can add to your life.